What is happening to our world? We have celebrities going in and out of rehab like yo yos and thousands of homeless addicts and alcoholics with many more people struggling to get or stay sober in homes, jobs, shelters, hospitals and jails. We should be looking at our countries policies to support illegal drug trafficking, corrupt politicians, law enforcement, doctors and pharmacists for starters and lets not forget insurance companies. Lets start with insurance companies and the insured. Surely they have ways to track when someone is abusing prescription drugs and yet they rarely do anything about it, why because of all the money they make. People have to use all kinds of medical services to get the ultimate drug or drugs of choice from their local pharmacists. They could not continue if these agencies, companies and medical providers joined forces to stop medical corruption.
Genuinely ill people have to wait in line behind those who are using the system to get pain medicine for example. Service providers are more interested in what is easy service and the money they can make on the backs of the insured irregardless of whether they are really helping cure anyone. Doctors need to rethink the Hypocratic oath which says, "First Do No Harm". Continuing to feed people drugs because you can make alot of money on it should be considered illegal and those doctors should be investigated. There are genuine situations where people have real pain and there is no cure for it, in those cases doctors should make them as comfortable as possible. However I remember one doctor, a multi millionaire on TV advertising how people needed oxycotin, on local TV and how he felt so much compassion for them, yet his own ex wife was driven to despair because of prescription drug addiction while they were married and in business together. He did nothing to help her, got divorced from her, fought her for the kids and treated her publicly like she was a piece of crap. He preyed on other woman who were later addicted and dependent on him while he played around with their lives and their families. Shame on us for allowing people like this to continue to practice and not only practice but to flourish.
I went to this shyster myself before I found out how corrupt he was, all he wanted to do was push drugs at me, and I am not one for taking drugs to begin with let alone getting addicted to them. I had diagnosises from other well respected doctors who actually practiced medicine and he did not address those diagnosises. I got away from him before he could do any real damage to me but I then watched as his practices and unethical behavior helped to destroy someone I love very much and he got away with it because of his millions. I heard story after story of his corrupt practices and the financial losses of people who got dependent on his services. He even bailed a patient out of jail to protect his own interests took over a whole family deluded them and helped to break up a marriage just to keep himself protected due to this inappropriate involvement with that patient.
What about the pharmacists, they are making their living dispensing drugs and some of them have had to go through detox and rehab themselves. Are they responsible to be aware if someone is coming into their places of business with their relatives and helpers to get drugs. Now most states are "on line" and can in a couple of minutes run a name and date of birth on someone to see if there is any fraud and turn it over to the narcotics investigators, but what about before it gets to this point. People need help, they don't need drugs for every problem they have. Why aren't pharmacists dealing more in herbal, alternative therapies or at least offering them more in their stores? Certainly those things are not cheap and they could make money on them. They may even bring results which means the person would not have to keep taking drugs, ah maybe that is the answer.
What about us as a society. We oogle over these celebrities, we support their drunken brawls, and follow their every move as they go from one drug induced stupor to another, we don't hold them accountable, stop paying them the big bucks and we glamorize this life style which is mostly a sham, empty unfulfilled lives except for those who have decent family situations and stability and a realistic sense of self.
Our government doesn;'t want to stop the illegal drug trade because it is too lucrative. The biggest joke is saying WAR ON DRUGS when the CIA and others have long been involved in the drug trade and they often allow drugs into the country as long as they are pushed mostly in the black or minority communities. That is another whole story.
We put people in prison that really need drug or alcohol treatment. This mystifys me! We would not think of putting someone in prison who was clinically mentally ill and had a proper legal defense to prove the same yet we lock people up who get no treatment, no counseling and warehouse them with a bunch of other serious criminals and even sociopaths and these people are then futher damaged. We are talking about cutting mental health in state politics when we should be increasing services to the mentally ill so they can get the help they need and many of these mentally ill are dually diagnosed. We have all these conferences and the people who are working in these government jobs enjoy hotel rooms and all kinds of perks including at casinos while the needs of the needy are discussed but the realy needs are really met.
What is really involved in the spiral down to being inebriated is a loss of sense of self respect, purpose and hope. People need to know they are loved that they matter, their sense of direction, to learn how to set goals and find a new way to live. People need counseling for the trauma in their lives, they need to eat right and exercise, they need friendship. Prison is not the answer for substance abusers. When are we going to reach out and take care of each other? Some day this is going to be someone you love, you will feel the pain of frustration and the deep reality that there are really little services out there for these people except for Christian places most places charge so much money there is no one who can afford to pay it.
I highly recommend Teen Challenge, New Life for Girls, Victory Outreach to name a few places for women and men but if your loved ones are struggling with mental illness and need some medicine they will not qualify to enter these programs as they are not set up to deal with medical issues where medicine is required to stabalize someone.
There are also programs such as AA, NA and Celebrate Recovery which I hear is very successful with Christians who want the Christian approach to the 12 step program. It is so much easier if you have a sponsor or a mentor who can assist you in making your meetings, staying on course, as the scripture says, "An isolated man rages against all wise judgement." We all need each other and fighting addictions together is easier than fighting alone.
Also another key in staying sober is to serve others, not to be codependent but to truly serve mankind and those less fortunate than you are, because in giving to others you make an investment in yourself and it will come back to bless you later.
I also think we need more community shelters, residential treatment programs, and especially domestic violence shelters for woman and children. We also need job programs where companies will take on some people, train them and employ them even though there is some risk of failure at least to try.
I will talk more on this subject later.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Friday, March 19, 2010
Jackson Mississippi Divorce, Child Custody also serving Hattiesburg, Vicksburg, Meridian, Madison, Brandon, Ridgeland, Northern, Central & Gulf
Probably the most distressing thing in the Private Investigating business is to see how adults use their children as pawns on a chess board of hatred, emotional depravity and manipulate them as insignifcant pieces whose little personalities and emotions can be discarded with little remorse or regret.
I have come to believe even stronger that most children are in desperate need of both parents whenever that is possible, short of extreme neglect or abuse, children grow and are nurtured best by both parents equally. I would really like to see a complete revision of our court system so that mediators are used with the intention of preserving the rights of both parents when it is feasible. Giving just one parent primary custody or sole legal custody creates such havoc and distress for the children. There has to be a way no matter how difficult where agreements can be made that are best for the children. Parents must put aside their selfish reasonings and pride to do whatever it takes to raise their children in the most normal enviroment as possible.
When judges allow themselves to become so bias toward one sex or toward one type of parent then they have no moral compass to guide them to unbiased decisions based upon what is best for the children. I see case after case where children are deprived of good parents time, love and guidance because of inept judgements. As the investigator we truly get to see both sides. We are hired by one side but when we are done investigating the other, we have also had time to learn more about our own clients. No one is perfect and certainly all our clients are not perfect, as much as we would like to believe we are also on the side of right, they too have flaws and need support and guidance.
There is something terribly wrong with our system when a loving mother who has spent most of her time as a stay at home mom until the divorce while her husband has been philandering and leaving home after work till all hours of the night, and then deliberately seeking out employment and not bringing his family with him to an out of state job over and over so he can basically be a bachelor to suddenly find herself fighting to even have visitation with her children every other weekend, to be forced to return to work to pay child support for children who are not even wanted by the father but he seeks to destroy her so he finds illicit ways to win in court. What is wrong with this picture?
Or how about this picture? Two men serving our country are basically swindled into having sex under a ruse and a few drinks, lied to about fertility and deliberately chosen for their vulnerability and naivity, they find after a cleverly used ovulation kit selects the best time that they are now fathers, who then turn around and pay child support willingly only to find man after man raising their children while their mother plays all sorts of games to keep their children from them. Additionally courts systems are mocked while these children are deprived of their decent good fathers and made to call different men daddy in their very tender years all because a woman is too lazy to work and wants a steady stream of support from men. How can this woman believe that she will not pay in the Karma sense or in the sense of reaping what she has sown? Her children unfortunately will pay the higher price while they try to sort out who their daddy is and how many more men will stand in, will the real daddys ever be able to take their rightful places before it is too late for these children?
Or what about this one, Grandma finds out that the ex son in law is watching porn in front of his small little boy and doing inappropriate things in front of the child. She takes the child to the counselor and as a result is forbidden to see her own grandchild after the pervert wins custody. This is a wonderful grandma who paid for private schooling and knows that the perverted father only wants the child to make the wife come back. I shudder to think if we will have a serial sex offender in a few years after years of being subjected to this filthy treatment of women in his fathers house.
Courts use guardian ad litums here in Mississippi and one has to wonder what they are thinking when they do not do a proper investigation of the facts. One situation comes to mind. This attorney states in a report that the one parent drove the children in very severely inclement weather but never bothered to check her facts with the weather history which would have shown her that the other parent was lying, which then would have had the other parent put in a proper light. Another situation has a grand parent keeping a diary from the day her grandchildren were born and all the entries are against her in law, odd that this person would have foreseen years before the need for a diary, you think a guardian ad litum would have questioned the validity of such a well constructed instrument. There ought to be some consequences for these lawyers if they do not investigate statements made by each party that they intend to put as facts in their reports.
How can a judge order a parent to have a psych evaluation for herself and her child and nothing is happening for over a year and this parent is not held in contempt. Our system is broken. Judges are biased and have way too much power in the decisions regarding children because too many children are continuing to be damaged. There needs to be more accountability in the court system. If the appeals courts see damaging evidence of inproprieties against judges they need to overturn those decisions and if judges will not follow the law and do the right thing by children they should be de benched and possibly disbarred.
50% of marriages end in divorce, and many of those involve children. We are in an epidemic crisis mode and emergency status. Who will stand for the children if we as Private Investigators don't?
I have come to believe even stronger that most children are in desperate need of both parents whenever that is possible, short of extreme neglect or abuse, children grow and are nurtured best by both parents equally. I would really like to see a complete revision of our court system so that mediators are used with the intention of preserving the rights of both parents when it is feasible. Giving just one parent primary custody or sole legal custody creates such havoc and distress for the children. There has to be a way no matter how difficult where agreements can be made that are best for the children. Parents must put aside their selfish reasonings and pride to do whatever it takes to raise their children in the most normal enviroment as possible.
When judges allow themselves to become so bias toward one sex or toward one type of parent then they have no moral compass to guide them to unbiased decisions based upon what is best for the children. I see case after case where children are deprived of good parents time, love and guidance because of inept judgements. As the investigator we truly get to see both sides. We are hired by one side but when we are done investigating the other, we have also had time to learn more about our own clients. No one is perfect and certainly all our clients are not perfect, as much as we would like to believe we are also on the side of right, they too have flaws and need support and guidance.
There is something terribly wrong with our system when a loving mother who has spent most of her time as a stay at home mom until the divorce while her husband has been philandering and leaving home after work till all hours of the night, and then deliberately seeking out employment and not bringing his family with him to an out of state job over and over so he can basically be a bachelor to suddenly find herself fighting to even have visitation with her children every other weekend, to be forced to return to work to pay child support for children who are not even wanted by the father but he seeks to destroy her so he finds illicit ways to win in court. What is wrong with this picture?
Or how about this picture? Two men serving our country are basically swindled into having sex under a ruse and a few drinks, lied to about fertility and deliberately chosen for their vulnerability and naivity, they find after a cleverly used ovulation kit selects the best time that they are now fathers, who then turn around and pay child support willingly only to find man after man raising their children while their mother plays all sorts of games to keep their children from them. Additionally courts systems are mocked while these children are deprived of their decent good fathers and made to call different men daddy in their very tender years all because a woman is too lazy to work and wants a steady stream of support from men. How can this woman believe that she will not pay in the Karma sense or in the sense of reaping what she has sown? Her children unfortunately will pay the higher price while they try to sort out who their daddy is and how many more men will stand in, will the real daddys ever be able to take their rightful places before it is too late for these children?
Or what about this one, Grandma finds out that the ex son in law is watching porn in front of his small little boy and doing inappropriate things in front of the child. She takes the child to the counselor and as a result is forbidden to see her own grandchild after the pervert wins custody. This is a wonderful grandma who paid for private schooling and knows that the perverted father only wants the child to make the wife come back. I shudder to think if we will have a serial sex offender in a few years after years of being subjected to this filthy treatment of women in his fathers house.
Courts use guardian ad litums here in Mississippi and one has to wonder what they are thinking when they do not do a proper investigation of the facts. One situation comes to mind. This attorney states in a report that the one parent drove the children in very severely inclement weather but never bothered to check her facts with the weather history which would have shown her that the other parent was lying, which then would have had the other parent put in a proper light. Another situation has a grand parent keeping a diary from the day her grandchildren were born and all the entries are against her in law, odd that this person would have foreseen years before the need for a diary, you think a guardian ad litum would have questioned the validity of such a well constructed instrument. There ought to be some consequences for these lawyers if they do not investigate statements made by each party that they intend to put as facts in their reports.
How can a judge order a parent to have a psych evaluation for herself and her child and nothing is happening for over a year and this parent is not held in contempt. Our system is broken. Judges are biased and have way too much power in the decisions regarding children because too many children are continuing to be damaged. There needs to be more accountability in the court system. If the appeals courts see damaging evidence of inproprieties against judges they need to overturn those decisions and if judges will not follow the law and do the right thing by children they should be de benched and possibly disbarred.
50% of marriages end in divorce, and many of those involve children. We are in an epidemic crisis mode and emergency status. Who will stand for the children if we as Private Investigators don't?
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